“The Story of the Stone Vol. IV- The Debt of Tears” by Cao Xueqin (translated by John Minford)

This volume continues the story of the Jia clan, both the Ning-Guo and Rong-Guo houses. Cao Xueqin again details the forms, duties, and protocols expected of such illustrious families, connected so intimately to the Imperial Household by government position and even marriage. Grandmother Jia’s grandchildren have all grown up and marriage is foremost on everyone in the household’s minds. Again, the differences in attitude towards the female and male Jia descendants becomes apparent. It is said of the young ladies of the household, only partially in jest, “Marry a daughter, throw out the water.” Lady Wang, Grandmother Jia’s daughter-in-law and Ladyship of the Rong-Guo House, continues, “Can’t you see that sooner or later every girl has to leave home, and that once she’s married her own family has no business to interfere? She must look to her own future. If fate has been kind to her, well and good. If not, she must learn to live with it all the same.” As for the males, her husband, Jia Zheng, states, “Speaking of Bao-yu, the boy spends all of his time loafing about in the garden—it simply won’t do. With one’s daughters—well, one has one’s disappointments, I realize, but in the long run girls get married and leave the family anyway. With a son, however, it is totally different. If he should fall by the wayside, the whole future of the family could be threatened.”

In this volume, Jia Zheng finally sends his son, Bao-yu, to school to learn the philosophical classics, primarily Confucius and Mencius. His tutor, Dai-Ru, admonishes the boy, “In the phrase sine Nomine, Nomen refers not to Success in the Worldly Sense but rather to an Individual’s Achievement in the Moral and Intellectual Spheres. In this sense it by no means implies Official Rank. On the contrary, many of the Great Sages of Antiquity were Obscure Figures who Withdrew from the World; and yet we hold them in the Highest Esteem, do we not?” Bao-yu’s female cousin, Dai-yu, also tutors him on the finer points of Buddhist philosophy, “Can’t you see? It’s the illusion of “me” that creates the illusion of “others”, and a life lived under these twin illusions is bound to be beset with frustrations, fears, confusion, foolish dreams and a host of other obstacles and entanglements.”

Living beyond the family’s means and eating into their capital to keep up appearances is a reality for all in the Jia household, which has finally even sunk at the most senior levels. Grandmother Jia’s eldest son, Jia She, observes, “We are not exactly the great and glorious house we once were, you know. Nothing but hollow facade.” His younger brother, Jia Zheng, chimes in grimly, “Our respectability is more than balanced by our lack of ability and positive achievement. We are living on borrowed time, and one day it will run out.” Even Grandmother Jia, herself, caustically comments, “In a family like ours we never need to do our own sewing, I know. But it’s as well to know how. Then you will never need be at the mercy of others.” Even a friendly ghost in her Ladyship’s dream chimes in, warning, “Prosperity may all too soon be spent; draw back, draw back before it is too late.”